Ethanol
by Cxtch
Summary: Ethanol: (C2H6O) A psychoactive drug present in all alcoholic beverages. In higher doses, it may cause vomiting, doubled-sightedness, liver failure and death. Rated T for adult themes.
1. Chapter 1

_Ethanol_

It was tough. Her thoughts were inflexible. Lying on her bed, she looked up at the ceiling. Normally, the mattress and duvet offered a haven from the anxieties of the outside world. Not this night. Perhaps another time she would feel comfortable falling asleep without a thought. Not this night. For reasons unknown to anybody else, she laid awake, watching invisible stars that she can't see with her eyes. If only she could reach them, maybe she'd then be truly joyful.

She dreamt of her mother again. Her heart ached for what once was and can never be. She rolled onto her side. Her blond hair was the exact colour of her mother's. Truly she should have come to terms with it, right? No. She was unsure of the reason, but everything felt so pointless to her now. She'd rather not eat. Rather not study, she'd prefer if she could just give up on everything. Her heart yearned to have Hannah and Barbara back in her dorm. They had always helped her through times like this. But she could not bring herself to speak to them about her feelings anymore. They felt too… distant.

She lay there, covered by a duvet that yielded no warmth, on a bed that offered no comfort, with eyes that saw no hope.

She would spend the entire night like this.

"Knock. Knock. Knock Knock. Knock knock knock. Knock knock knock knock knock."

The brunette squinted as the sound of the rhythmic knocking filled her ears. She sat up and asked, "Who's there?" The light quickly offended her eyes as she looked at the bespectacled witch who stood over her.

"Fibonacci" Lotte replied gleefully.

Akko rolled her eyes and stood up. She looked up out the window and saw the sun was just peeking over the trees. She looked back to Lotte and Sucy who were already dressed.

"Our classes start earlier, now. Remember?" came the monotone toned Sucy.

"Oh yeah! Class of 2019!" Akko quickly brightened and leaped out of bed. She looked at her uniform. It's barely changed since her first year, but that's what she liked. She picked up her wand, which was now instead of the dull grey, glistening silver. She looked at both of her friends who also carried the silver wands.

Since her first year, her magic has improved substantially. She could almost fly as well as Amanda did in their first year. She picked up her wand. She recited a spell she's learned last year. " _Indutus adepto mihi."_ Almost instantly she was dressed with her hair tied back. She still fronted the same short bangs, long hair and short ponytail. It was iconic.

The dining hall was filled with new first year students as well as Akko's year. It had only been a week into first semester and she loved all of her classes… well most of them. She still hand magic history with Finnlan but that class was mandatory. Akko ate her breakfast, which consisted of bread, an apple and a pancake. Scarfing her food down, she looked at Lotte and Sucy who were respectively not paying her any mind. Sucy was seemingly writing down ideas on how to grow her own mushrooms so she wouldn't have to find them herself. Although knowing her, she could be writing about anything. Lotte was head first into the 368th edition of _Nightfall._ She read vigorously

Akko surveyed the room, she spotted Hannah and Barbara but there was no sign of Diana. She pursed her lips at the oddity but decided to pay it no mind. Ever since the first week started, she never showed up for breakfast.

"Hey guys," Akko started

"Hm?" replied Sucy, unenthusiastically.

"Why do you think Diana hasn't been to breakfast?"

Lotte didn't look up from her novel. "She probably has extra homework to finish in the morning."

That explanation was enough for the restless witch.

As Akko entered witch history, she spotted Diana. Calm and collected. She opted for the seat beside her and dropped her history textbook in front of her. "Ugh, these are always so heavy" Akko complained. She didn't get a response from the blond. "Hey… Diana?"

"Yes?"

"What's up?"

"Nothing"

Akko glanced at Diana to see her head looking down at a blank piece of paper. She didn't seem right. Something about her was off. She was distant as well as, vulnerable… "Are you okay?"

"I am quite well"

This didn't satisfy her. She could tell she was hiding something… and she was going to figure it out no matter the cost. Diana was her friend; she was like family to her. Akko nodded, clearly dissatisfied with the response.

The entire day, she attempted to speak to Diana, to see what was amiss. However, the closest she got was a simple "I could be better." Akko lay on her bed, thinking about Diana. She was worried about her. Diana never lied to her if she wasn't feeling well. What changed in her all of a sudden? She knew Diana was under lots of pressure… but she didn't believe it would be affecting her like this.

Diana entered her room. The moment she did, her spell wore off. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and thought to herself. _I look like shit._ Her hair was a mess, her eyes had deep bags, and she looked disheveled. It's what she normally looked like when she wasn't hiding her appearance with a spell. She glanced out her large window and watched as the last remnants of the sun ducked below the horizon. She laid her back on her bed, not bothering to change out of her clothes.

She closed her eyes, hoping to finally catch a glimpse of sleep. She couldn't. She was tired but she couldn't sleep. She decidedly sat up and made her way to her desk. " _Resero,"_ she muttered before the main cabinet on her desk opened. There were bottles of a clear liquid. They were glass and had no labels, just a magical script only she could read: "Vodka." She picked up an unopened bottle and brought it to the top of her desk. The glass was cool. The bottle was comforting, holding the glass was therapeutic.

She didn't open the cupboard just to hold the bottle. " _Aperio."_ The cork opened and she brought her nose to the neck of the bottle. She inhaled. The fumes were strong. Enticing. Inviting. Without a second thought, she brought the bottle to her lips and tilted her head up. She tasted the course rough liquid as it burnt the back of her throat as she kept on drinking. She didn't mind the burn. Feeling a throat burn was better than not feeling anything. It was as of late she had started drinking. She hadn't known why she started. It made her feeling happy when she couldn't feel anything. Being happy on the account of poisoning yourself was better than feeling nothing, she eventually convinced herself of such a fact. Hannah and Barbara grew more distant from her, although not noticeably to anyone else. But she felt betrayed, so when they decided to ask for a room for themselves halfway through second year, she had felt deceived. Those were her friends: her friends that had lost interest in her. Ever since then, she found it easier to drink when she was alone. She drank to forget her friends, her mom, and her inability to come to terms with herself. It helped her escape, and she was fine with that.

She put the bottle down, and gasped for a breath. She'd never drunk that much before. Much less in one minute. She put the bottle back with the dozens of empty ones. She closed her cabinet and the intoxication was immediate. She fell back down onto her bed as she felt her body numb and euphoria rush into her head.

She closed her eyes as her thoughts became incoherent; her mind emptied itself of its contents. She felt her heart rate slow and she felt as if her mind was shutting down. She wanted no more than to finally fall asleep.

Knock.

Akko waited patiently. She was truly nervous. It was way past curfew but her nagging thoughts wouldn't allow her not to check on Diana. If not for Diana's sake, then her own. She knew these weren't good signs. She knew Diana hadn't eaten much the past week so she held a strawberry pie she "Borrowed" from the kitchen. She waited, not hearing anything. She knocked again.

"Diana, if you don't open this door, I'm opening it for you!" Just then, she heard footsteps, not from behind the door, but beside her. She sighed and looked and saw Finnlan.

"Miss Kagari, what are you doing up so late, and with a pie?"

"I just wan-"

"I'm sure Miss Cavendish wouldn't want to be disturbed right now. Go to your room. Now."

"Bu-"

And with that, Finnlan had had enough of her incessant complaining. She cast a spell causing her to go mute. Akko attempted to speak but her vocal chords were numb. She opened her mouth but no sound came out

"It will wear off in the morning, now" Finnlan seized the treat and cast another spell. Akko instantly found herself back in her dorm, unable to speak. When she reached for the doorknob, it was as if her hands were magnets that stopped her from getting any closer to the doorknob. No matter how hard she tried, the closer she got, the more she was pushed back. She sighed and gave up. She lied down in her bed. _I'll talk to her tomorrow._

The next morning, Diana wasn't in history class or any others. Classmates went to check on her after dinner. With no response, to her name, they forced their way into her room.

Autopsy confirms cause of death: alcohol poisoning.

(A/N: Please review honestly and tell me what you thought.)


	2. Chapter 2

UPDATE: I will be rewriting ethanol. It will be a much longer piece touching on more issues than just alcoholism. It will be posted under the same title though. Stay tuned.


End file.
